Say what you wanna say, And let the words fall out... Honestly I wanna see you be brave

Yikes, the fact that my senior year is flying by is freaking me out. Already in October, life is unreal. I still have so much to accomplish before I leave Clarkson. The main thing I want to accomplish, is making my mark. Something that Clarkson will remember me for, cause god knows I will be remembering Clarkson when I start to pay my student loans back.

I'm working on it though, making a difference.

Today my grandfather would of turned 99, if he was still alive. Its almost unreal how long ago it's been. I'm not usually one of those people that mark the anniversary every year on my Facebook status but this year means a lot. Why you may ask? Because if my grandpa was alive, I would love to talk to him about all that I have accomplished or the fact that I wish he could see me graduate from Clarkson. He always thought I was smart, but I never got the chance to show him what I was capable of doing, especially since he passed away my freshman year of high school. For some reason his approval, meant the most to me. He was the biggest critic of my life, one of the bluntest people I will ever know. He never sugar coated anything, just the way I like it. When I was younger I didn't appreciate how blunt he was, but now at 21 years old I learned to really appreciate it. Nobody likes bullshit, they just want you to tell it how it is, that's how I live my life today.

After going home for Fall Break, my younger siblings still amaze me. The fact that I go to McDonald's (with my 10 year old brother and 13 year old sister) and they just get up and start dancing randomly in the restaurant. They don't care what anyone thinks of them, and they are highly respected from their friends. I picked my brother up from school and everyone said bye to him. They reminded me to just be happy and live life. I can only hope to live life the way they do, and I always tell them not to change!

That's the perks of living in a big family! Everyone is so different that you learn so much. I learned to not bullshit the bullshitter, to not care what other people think, and to not judge others because what good is that. 

So here's to making a difference, because the world could always use a little change.

Anybody with me?

You're gonna miss me by my walk, You're gonna miss me by my talk, Ohh you're gonna miss me when I'm gone

So Summer 13, this is it. Today is my last day in VT, my mom and I will be heading up to the dirty dam tomorrow to go back to school.  I am going to miss living in Burlington so much, it's funny how nervous I was when my mom was dropping me off, to now 12 weeks later. A relaxing place by the water with so much life.

I had my last day at GMCR yesterday, and hated to say goodbye to so many awesome people. Words can't explain how amazing some of the people are at GMCR.  It truly hasn't sunken in yet, that I won't be going back to work on Monday morning to make my 8 am Espresso with Rachel.  I can only hope they will miss my loud voice and laugh. Everyone always told me when they needed to find me they would just listen for my voice, hahaha. I'll miss being an effective trouble maker around the office and sending funny emails to Laura and Rachel. 

But most of all this summer is full of some baller memories:

I might not be tan but this summer I:

• Drank an unlimited supply of the best coffee
• Tasted numerous breweries, ciderys and vineyards
• Ate at some of the best restaurants 
• Witnessed gorgeous green scenic views
•  Laughed and Laughed and Laughed.

It's crazy how change can scare a person. This is the first summer I didn't spend at home with my family, at first I didn't think I could do it. But it wound up being one of the best summers of my life. 

So Vermont, I think this is a I'll See You later, we will save the goodbyes for something else.

To a great Summer,

Anybody with me?

Damn it feels good to be a gangster...

Yes, as soon as you turn 21 years old, you become a gangster its inevitable kids. Jeez, last time I wrote a blog I was about half way through my internship I believe and now I'm almost done with 3 weeks left.  

With my birthday just passing, and yes I can't believe I am 21 years old, where the heck have the years gone? Everyone kept asking me, "Mary what are you doing for your birthday?" Well honestly I always thought you should live everyday as your birthday. Everyday you get older and you should celebrate each day and live it to the fullest. So in order to escape, I went to my safe haven, Potsdam City. I didn't need any big plans for my birthday, just spending time with my friends, enjoying the day off, playing outside and drinking some beers. Sounds like a perfect birthday to me, and you know what it was! I was never one to make my birthday a big deal and it was nice to take it easy for once.

With my internship getting closer to the end all I can say is, wow. I have learned so much this summer. I have learned a plethora of information about coffee, how to be an engineer, how to live on your own, pay bills, and most importantly I have learned a lot about friends. The interns and employees (mainly Judy our work "mom") I have met this summer have taught me a lot about life:

• Don't let your emotions get in the way of things.
• Life is so much easier when you don't care what people think of you and you just be yourself.
• Don't let petty people bring you down because in the end they will never win.
• When you have a batman voice embrace it? (Judy makes me do my batman voice to everyone in the office, for some reason I should be proud of my hidden talent?) 

But I am not saying good bye to them yet though they have 3 more weeks with me!! So far I have been a boss at my internship I have acquired 2 cubicles, I'm going straight to the top! 

My boss calls me an "Effective Troublemaker". I like it, I think it has a ring to it.

Living everyday like it's my birthday,

Anybody with me?

Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me ....

Well after all the Disney songs my partner in crime has been singing to me, I had to pick a Disney song for the title of this blog ...

Where do I begin.. I have learned so much this far on my internship not only about GMCR , not only about people, but about myself.

I guess I can first start with the book I received in the mail from my best friend Karen.  This books timing was unreal. I had my first race of the summer already and yes I started out with a 10k (go big or go home, right?). But the book has really opened my eyes. First of all, it has reminded me that even though I don't play a D3 sport at Clarkson, I am still an athlete. All throughout my life I have been an athlete, and being a runner is indeed being an athlete. I have lost that part of myself and it used to be a big part of my life, it defined me. The book has inspired me to get outside everyday and get those miles in, because as soon as I stop, starting again is the hardest part. I am 90% sure I will be doing a half marathon this summer!

Second of all, the other day I was shopping and someone defined me as a size large. That really hit home. My whole life weight has been something that has defined me, it all started when I was a little girl and what my grandpa used to tell me. "So round so firm so fully packed", yes Gramps I get it thank you. At first when I hear these comments it makes me upset but then I think to myself "wait, I could probably run farther and faster than you". Why? Because with me failure has never been an option and yes I do have weight to lose, but my need to succeed and determination exceeds the rest. I have already lost weight this summer, and plan to be in great shape by the time my senior year begins.

The third thing I learned is from my dad, "you have a great sense of humor Mary, utilize it". Probably by far one of the best pieces of advice I have ever been given. This summer I have learned a lot about being patient, dealing with others and "keeping my cool". When I feel stressed out or have the need to scream, I make a joke about it, I mean someone once said "Laughter is the best medicine".

One of my favorite lines from this book I'm reading (Eat & Run by Scott Jurek) is "Sometimes you just do things!" There are many times in life when people ask you why, or they criticize your decisions. My response "Sometimes I just do things", because I believe it's the right thing to do or "I do what I want" haha!

Here's to getting the most out of everyday (whether it rains or shines)

Is Anybody with me?

"Just give me a reason, just a little bit's enough...."

Yes, this song is extremely overplayed and yes, I haven't made a blog post in a while so I thought I would update you and myself on my life. My dad would call this, "a time of self reflection". Well here it is dad...

From the many posts on Facebook, I am sure you can all tell I am not in Canajoharie anymore for the summer, but I am in Burlington,VT. A new place surrounded by a surplus of people I don't know, and the unknown of city life. The first night was overwhelming, I didn't think I could make it through the summer but somebody needed to "just give me a reason" that I could.  I talked to my big sis Hannah Monk, who reassured me  that with a positive attitude and enough sleep I could make it through the summer.

And with that, I went to bed.

I just finished my first week at Green Mountain Coffee Roasters, a week of orientation and on Friday, I got to meet my boss, a Clarkson Alum I might add!  After seeing my cubicle, work computer, mailbox and name tag; reality finally hit; I did it! I landed a summer job in a great company and I was surrounded by great people.  All of the other interns are awesome each bringing a wonderful personality and background to the table.  Human Resources told us that about 1300 applications were sent in this year with only 24 interns selected, lets just say I patted myself on the back for that one and rewarded myself with a cup of coffee.  ;)

This summer is one for self reflection. To get myself into the best shape with my resources (so much outdoor activity in Vermont), to really find out what I want to do after my senior year, and to learn to live own my own.

I have 11 weeks and nothing but motivation!

I would like to thank all my friends and family who reached out to me this week! It really meant a lot!

I'm ready for Summer 2013,

Anybody with me?

If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make a change.....

Recently at school we had an Anti-Slur Campaign where we Cured the Slur ( I came up with the slogan haha) but the campaign was powerful in the essence that its a step into changing Clarkson. JBall the professor involved in the campaign pulled me aside after to talk to me about the huge impact I  have on this campus, but what she also reminded me of was that I have one year left at Clarkson.  With this year left, I have only one more time around to make my impact on campus. But in order to make this change, I have to take a look at myself .. well at least that's what the King of Pop would say...

Four finals stand in the way between me and the end of my junior year at Clarkson. After that I go home for "summer" which will be less than two weeks with the fam.  This to me is bitter sweet; getting this internship was all I ever wanted, but being with my family for the summer is tradition. But after talking to one of my best friends wittle baby Evan, he assured me if anyone could handle the "real world" it would be me.  Sometimes you just need the push from the right person.

As for this "Man in the Mirror" more like Woman in the Mirror, sorry Michael changing the lyrics up a bit. My ultimate goal is to reshape myself, in the real world this summer. I want to come back to Clarkson my senior year feeling like I am in the best shape mentally and physically.  In order to leave the positive impact I want to leave, I have to be happy with myself.  I got a lot on my plate Senior year, 18 credits, Resident Director, Treasurer and Expansion Chair of KDX, a new event called Up Till Dawn I am the Cultivation Chair, and of course my job at financial aid.  Involvement has truly shaped me as an individual on this campus, yes some may say "you have tooo much on your plate", or "do you ever have time for yourself?"  or "do you ever sleep". The answer to all of those is yes. Yes I do have way to much on my plate, Yes I usually use the summer for time for myself, and Yes I do sleep on the weekends.

You only do college once, no one ever wishes they slept more and I wanted to live college without any regrets. My main goal was to graduate, and my other goal was to be well known at Clarkson (for the good reasons). I'm getting there!

But for now its STUDY STUDY STUDY, FINALS FINALS FINALS FINALS, and then a sweet trip home to Canjo City.

Here's to the real world, and all it has to offer,
Anybody with Me?

"Gonna be an engineer.."

So as everyone or some people have noticed all my blogs start with song lyrics, usually ones that describe the post. Well believe it or not this is a song and I heard it on Monday by Peggy Seeger.  A silly song about how a woman wanted to be an engineer but her mom told her to be a lady instead.  Well after interviews and more interviews and rejections and rejections...

 I tried to keep my head up and then my phone rang today...

I got offered a Coffee Processing Engineer position at Green Mountain Coffee Roasters. Yes a civil engineer is working at a Coffee factory, but you know what, it just proves with the right attitude and a love for coffee you can go far in life.  ;)

I chose this song mainly because after all these interviews and rejections I started to question my major choice. Is engineering for me? Can I really do this? Am I going to get a job? I got nervous; all my mom could do was tell me to wait and keep my head up.  After accepting the position I wasn't excited but nervous again. The fact that I am going to be in Vermont all summer, learning how to be an adult, learning how to be an engineer, it all overwhelmed me.  But my mom and dad were so unbelievably proud, and that was enough to make sure I told myself to "man up" and do it.

Plus my dad even admitted that the news made him cry tears of joy. See how tough I am, I can make a 57 year old man shed a tear.(P.S. Don't tell him you read this =p)

I guess the moral of this post is that there are times in life where you question your decisions and you start thinking what you have done was either a waste of time or just you don't belong.  But with the right attitude and a go-getter persona you can make things work out, cause things fall into place when you have a good head on your shoulders.

Now other than that, looks like my new summer home is Waterbury, Vermont.  Gotta get my housing all set then I would love visitors!

Road trip, Anybody with me?